Tender is the Night
by Folle
Summary: In which Sokka gains a responsibility he was never supposed to have. [Sokka and Katara centric]
1. Chapter 1

_"How will it affect me now that this earliest and strongest of protections is gone?"_

* * *

Sokka sighed. His sister had wandered off in the extensive grounds of the Fire Lord again. While he was not worried about what she would encounter, he sensed there was something inside her… He didn't want her to be alone if anything happened.

Before he could start after her, however, the Fire Lord himself interrupted him.

"Ah, Sokka. I have been looking for someone to share a good cup of tea with me." Sokka bowed respectfully.

"Thank you, Lord Iroh, but Katara's run off into your gardens and I was just leaving to find her…" Iroh half smiled and dipped his chin in acknowledgement of Sokka's unspoken words. Then his smile blurred until it remained only at the corners of his lips, allowing Iroh to retain hope in his countenance while lending gravity to his words.

"How is your sister? I'm afraid I haven't seen her myself for a few days." The underlying tone of Iroh's gentle query caught Sokka's attention. A hard glint settled in his eyes.

"She's doing quite well. She's very strong." The dregs of Iroh's smile disappeared and he frowned. In Sokka's eagerness to protect his sister he had read Iroh's intentions incorrectly. He responded in a conciliatory tone.

"Indeed. No one could dispute it. Her determination and her faith in a young boy saved the world." The roughness of Sokka's indignation was smoothed as he realized his mistake. He could only murmur a small "yes" in reply. "Well, when you find her, bring her back for tea. I'll wait for the two of you." Sokka thanked him before bounding off.

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Sokka found his sister on a stone bench. The search had taken longer than he expected because he had first scouted out every pond, stream, and fountain. He had been sure Katara would seek out water. He was slightly shaken when he discovered he was wrong. He announced his presence by pretending to be angry.

"There you are! I looked everywhere for you!" Katara turned to his voice and Sokka saw her eyes were a little sore. She laughed a little, smiled apologetically. She knew he wasn't really mad but she felt guilty anyway.

"Hey, Sokka. I'm sorry. I guess I'm not used to reporting to you yet." Now it was Sokka who felt guilty. Because of Katara's selflessness, _he _had been the last to see their father while _she _had stayed behind in Ba Sing Sei. It all felt so long ago, but Katara would never see their father again. Sokka sat on the bench next to her, put an arm around her shoulders, and squeezed.

"What's the plan, Chief?" Katara meant it as a joke, but the weight of the words pained them both.

"I think it's time to go home."

"Home?" Katara's voice trembled a little.

"We both have plenty to do. After all, you're the first Master Waterbender our tribe has had in a long time. And I—" Sokka cut himself off abruptly. It was too much, at that moment, to mention his duties because he had inherited them. Katara nodded quickly and the moment passed. "But right now, Iroh wants us to have tea with him." Sokka continued. Katara nodded again and stood, brushing herself off.

"That'll be nice. I haven't seen him for a few days." She looked to Sokka for reassurance.

"He's had a lot of meetings and stuff. You know, Fire Lord and all." Katara smiled faintly, then frowned with sudden dread.

"Zuko's not going to be there, is he?" Sokka resisted the urge to wince at her words. They had both become friends with Zuko, but Katara had always understood him better. That was her nature. Ever since the news about their father, however, Katara had avoided him. Sokka knew Zuko didn't know why, and Sokka knew it bothered him. Sokka shook his head.

"Iroh didn't say anything about it, so probably not." Katara nodded, satisfied, as they began walking. Sokka knew she would be okay, knew they would be okay, but for now he would be strong for Katara when she wasn't strong enough for herself.

* * *

Note: All quotes at the beginning of the chapters will be from F. Scott Fitzgerald's _Tender is the Night_ unless otherwise noted.


	2. Chapter 2

_"That is really all that's the matter with me."_

* * *

When word had come to Sokka and his sister about their father, in the midst of the confusion that follows war and proceeds peace, Aang hadn't been there. Those final days of war had caused him to realize how important Guru Pathik's words were, so Aang had decided to get more of them before they became unavailable. Besides, something told him words of wisdom would be scarce during the reconstruction period. He only planned to be gone for a month, but time had stretched until it started to lose meaning when he was with the guru. So when he returned he felt just as he had when he first awoke from that hundred years of slumber: like he had missed the events of a lifetime.

The man (just barely a man, but Aang had trouble believing it) in front of him was just like and yet so unlike the Sokka who had disbelieved he could be beaten by fan-wielding girls, the Sokka who had cried over the loss of his boomerang, the Sokka who had seen through Jet even when Aang had trusted him and the Sokka who had discovered the solar eclipse that Aang wanted to stare. Sokka's new responsibilities had made his stiffer, but there was something else. He listened attentively to Sokka's words, hoping to catch it.

"We heard a few days after you left." Sokka paused to detach himself; he had to move away. "We started to make plans, arranging the ships—all that. I was supposed to be here."

"Why didn't you leave?" Aang gently prodded. He felt Sokka's anguish as he gathered his next words. Aang knew that this was it: the something else.

"Katara got sick, really sick." Sokka puffed out a long breath that turned white in the frosty air. Stars twinkled above him and Sokka lowered his voice as if his words disturbed them. "Iroh was really generous, no diplomatic formalities. That woman who taught Katara some healing stuff from the Northen tribe? The one who knew Gran-gran? I can't—I can't remember her name. She came. Doctors from every nation." Sokka shook his head and kicked the crusty snow with the toe of his boot. Then he looked plaintively at his friend. "Aang, I thought she was going to die."

"But she didn't." Aang had already seen Katara, already knew the outcome of Sokka's story, but he still had to hear Sokka confirm it.

"No, she didn't." Sokka tucked his arms behind his back and looked towards the sea from his newly built watch tower. A very small smile formed on his lips. "She didn't die because she wouldn't." And then the something else was gone. Sokka turned back towards Aang to ask jovially "What have you been doing all this time?" Aang answered with a casualness he didn't feel and the conversation flowed on, only now he thought he understood the rigidness pervading the young chieftain's stride and why Katara, who was as sweet and as compassionate as always, was quieter.


	3. Chapter 3

_"It's always a delusion when I see what you don't want me to see."_

* * *

Sokka found her, as always, on the new training fields. They weren't as expansive or as grand as the ones in the Northern tribe, but their Master had attracted an impressive number of students, effectively breaking the monopoly of the Northern tribe. Her hair, though messy, had yet to come undone and she had taken her parka off. This particular article of clothing was soon to become a source of contention. Sokka picked it up and moved towards his sister, who had yet to notice him through her concentration.

"Katara!" He yelled.

"Not now, Sokka." Sokka, determined, walked insistently closer.

"Yes now!"

"Fine." Katara's hands dropped and the icy snow and water she had been working with returned to the ground, soaking Sokka on the way. Katata laughed and Sokka's anger diffused as he realized he did not hear that laugh often. Sokka joined her, though when their laughter had tapered off he decided he would still say what he had to come to say.

"It's too cold to take your coat off." He stated matter-of-factly.

"Actually, it makes me too hot when I'm training." Katara's eyes glinted in the bright sunlight reflecting off the snow.

"Are you sure? I don't want you to get sick." As the real issue surfaced, Katara took offense. She snatched her coat from Sokka's hands so she could extract the water from it.

"I'm not a paper doll, Sokka." She pointed out dangerously. Sokka put his hands up, palms forward.

"I know."

"Then stop treating me like one!" Katara, finished with her parka, stalked away. Sokka hastily followed.

"I just think you're not as strong as you think you are." Katara rounded on him, throwing her hands in the air. Snow and ice followed them.

"What?!"

"The doctors, they told me—"

"Doctors?! I'm a healer too, did you forget? Don't you think I know my limits?!"

"That was one lesson, Katara! You have to be careful, or…" Sokka didn't want to finish his own sentence. Katara, yet to be pacified, continued to yell.

"Or what? I'm not made of glass! You think because you're Chief now you can tell me what to do, just like dad! But you're not—you're not…" Katara's hands fell to her sides and the snow crunched beneath her as she sank to her knees, tired and overwhelmed. She was crying now. "…my father." She choked out the last of her angry words then looked at Sokka, his brave face stricken with grief. "I'm sorry, Sokka, I—" Sokka knelt in front of Katara and hugged her tight, nodding his head as they both mourned the loss of their father and their innocence.


	4. Chapter 4

_"Except now there're plenty of consequences."_

* * *

Gran-gran wasn't as spry as Sokka remembered, but her wit never lost its luster, nor her wisdom.

"Don't you worry about her, Gran-gran?"

"Oh Sokka, you've become so protective." Sokka blinked at his grandmother's reproach.

"Isn't that what I'm supposed to do? Dad would have wanted it that way." Sokka remembered the charge his father had given him clearly when he had refused to allow Sokka to accompany him and the warships after the raid that took his mother. He hadn't understood then, the important seriousness of his father's words, but he thought he understood now.

"Protecting her doesn't mean you don't let her live her life." His grandmother continued.

"She _is_ living her life. She's the Master Waterbender of our tribe. She's practically second-in-command." Gran-gran chuckled. Her two squabbling grandchildren were the leaders of their tribe, the forefront of the community's government. Even if the Southern Water tribe was small, it was amazing to her still, especially with them so young.

"You have to be strong, Sokka, stronger than you've ever been." Gran-gran was not chuckling now. Sokka nodded. He wasn't laughing either.

"That's why I'm sending her to Omashu as my personal representative." Gran-gran nodded her head sagely, then cocked an eyebrow.

"Is this because you believe in her or because some of the young warriors have gotten a little persistent?" Sokka grinned wryly before answering.

"Maybe a little of both."


	5. Chapter 5

_"The orchestra was playing 'Poor Butterfly.'"_

* * *

_"I'm sorry, __Sokka__, but your sister…is dead."_

Sokka sat up straight to find himself among his furs. He was covered in sweat despite his frozen surroundings. It had been the same wretched dream that had first plagued him when he had had to leave Katara in the Fire Nation while she was recovering. He reminded himself that no one had ever spoken those words with such finality except for the phantoms of the night whose words he would not trust. Katara was not dead; she was simply on her way to Omashu. Sokka pulled on his thickest parka and went outside to watch the moon. He was comforted enough by the fact that the same moon watched Katara and so he soon returned to his bed, overcome by a deep and dreamless sleep.


	6. Chapter 6

_"She felt a little betrayed and sad, but presently a moving object came into sight."_

* * *

The carriage rolled along over the smooth roads of the Earth Kingdom with finesse. Although Katara was enjoying the ride, she felt she should have walked, just to show she could. As it was, she wasn't sure whether the carriage was due to Sokka's clout or her own. If she found Sokka had ordered the carriage for her…

Katara leaned back against the plush cushions of her seat and closed her eyes. She would never tell Sokka, but the warmth of the Earth Kingdom was a relief compared to the frigid wilderness she called home. Katara opened her eyes again. She knew why Sokka was so protective, and yet she couldn't understand it at all. Hadn't she always been a strong person? One moment of weakness and now it was like he didn't trust her at all. It was actually painfully ironic when she considered how _she_ had been the one who took care of Sokka when their mother died. Katara halted her train of thought forcefully. She recognized the gaping chasm these musings would lead to and so she distracted herself with thoughts of Omashu, King Bumi, and the diplomatic aspects of her visit. Her vigilance was soon rewarded; she had arrived in the city. With a sigh she descended the carriage, fully prepared to keep fooling herself as long as was necessary.


	7. Chapter 7

_"The impertinence, the right to invade implied, astounded him."_

* * *

"I hate this city."

"I thought you liked Bumi."

"Well, I suppose it has to have one redeeming quality." Aang laughed. Toph had taken to Bumi in a way no one else could. Perhaps it was the way dirt clung to his feet. "Tell me why we're here again."

"It's a peace conference, Toph, not a prison camp."

"Maybe to you." Toph mumbled in reply.

"I know you didn't want to be here, but it means a lot to me." Toph grinned.

"Whatever, Twinkletoes." Recognizing this as Toph's way of accepting his gratitude gracefully, Aang said nothing further but observed the rainbow of colors adorning the room. There were representatives from every nation mingling, talking, eating. Aang swelled with joy. This was what he remembered from a hundred years ago. This was the peace he had hoped for, worked so hard for, given up everything for. As his gaze swept around the hall, however, his eyes came to rest on a solitary blue figure and he deflated a little. Toph seemed to sense the change in his mood.

"Is she still refusing to speak to Zuko?" Aang looked down and shook his head. Toph's ability to read situations accurately was uncanny.

"It looks like it."

"I wonder why. Have you ever asked her?" Aang choked on the preposterous suggestion couched in Toph's question.

"I can't just ask—"

"Why not? C'mon, you know she likes to talk." Aang, who could feel Toph was on the verge of shouting "Sugarqueen!" loud enough for everyone to hear, stifled the atmosphere with an oppressive comment.

"Not anymore, Toph. Not anymore."


	8. Chapter 8

_"…and wishing he had always been as good as he had intended to be."_

* * *

The air was hot enough to take Sokka's breath away, without the fire in every room. He would be thankful when it was time to return to the glaciers of his wintry home. Sokka frowned. He hadn't wanted to leave Katara by herself, but she refused to accompany him to the Fire Nation. She had her students, after all, and _someone_ had to take charge while he was away. Sokka knew these were nothing more than excuses. In fact, he knew Katara enjoyed opportunities to visit warmer climes. However, she stalwartly and repeatedly refused to go to the Fire Nation, even though Lord Iroh had personally invited her along with Sokka. He sighed. Of course Iroh had been disappointed when Katara had not stepped off the boat with him. Zuko hadn't said much about it, until now. He seemed to have materialized from the walls Sokka was aimlessly wandering. At first Sokka had taken him for an apparition, but he was forced the abandon the idea because apparitions didn't speak.

"How is she?" Sokka was confused at first.

"Hmm?"

"Your sister, Katara. Is she okay?" Though Sokka expected it, Zuko was not impatient.

"She's…uh," Sokka decided on honesty. "She's obstinate."

"Uncle too. He won't admit it sometimes." Sokka resisted an urge to scoff. Zuko sounded more like he was describing himself.

"Well, she won't let me interfere. I couldn't get her to come." Sokka offered by way of an apology. Zuko nodded. Then, uncharacteristically, he offered a soft request as he left.

"Take care of her, Sokka."


	9. Chapter 9

_"She did not know whether she was attracted or repelled, but only that she was deeply moved."_

* * *

Sokka wanted to rub his own face in the snow, life was that hard. Treaties. International committees. Local disputes. Festivities. Trade (foreign and domestic). Hunting parties. The fact that he was the Avatar's best friend. His family. So many things that seemed to clamor for his attention. He felt lucky that Katara was capable and tried to help with his work load. However, in some ways Katara needed more attention that anyone or anything else, though she didn't ask for it.

"Lord Iroh asked if he could send his ambassador here, for a change." Katara choked on air and dropped the pieces of parchment she had been examining for Sokka.

"What?!"

"It's only fair. We've—I guess I should say_ I've_—" (here Sokka gave Katara a hard stare for emphasis) "always been the one to do the traveling." He continued to stare Katara down, but she made no move to speak. "If you'd have come with me in the Spring…" Sokka's thoughts went unfinished; Katara was shaking her head.

"It's no use, Sokka." Her words were quiet but firm, spoken with her eyes averted. Sokka wanted to smack his forehead, but he had given up that habit the moment he became a man. Besides, childish antic that it was, it would not have helped in this situation.

"Stop it, Katara. Stop it! Aang told me about Omashu. He said you hardly spoke, even to him, and you practically ran away from anything even remotely red! How do you think that looks to our allies?" Katara stared at the frozen wall behind Sokka, not looking directly at him, but rather to the side.

"I don't know what you want me to say." Sokka rubbed his stubbled chin in frustration.

"I don't want you to say anything unless it's what _you_ want to say." Katara's gaze finally drifted towards his, though she did not move her head. Sokka ignored the hollow feeling this suddenly induced. He tried again. "I just—" Katara nodded swiftly and left before he could finish, her feet crunching in the snow.


	10. Chapter 10

_"I wanted to know all of you too—especially you."_

* * *

"Avatar."

"Ambassador." Aang dipped his head in formal greeting, and then grinned to let Zuko know he refused to act the dignitary. Zuko did not smile; he found it too difficult as an icy wind swept the frozen desert. It was not what Zuko thought of as summer, even if the sun never set.

"Zuko, have you ever been penguin sledding?" Zuko regarded Aang's enthusiasm with a sidelong glance.

"No." His answer was succinct, almost to the point of curt.

"You should try it. It's great!" Aang paused, considering. "Maybe…maybe I could get Katara to come with us…" Zuko turned his head sharply in Aang's direction, his eyebrow raised in surprise. "D'you think she'd come?" Aang asked hopefully, almost pitifully. Even Aang seemed to have realized how preposterous his suggestion was. Zuko didn't answer and Aang looked at his feet, sheepishly. "Well, we could still go." But Zuko knew Aang's heart was no longer in it, so they stood still as the sun shone on without making the air any warmer.

* * *

AN: Expect the next chapter later today.  



	11. Chapter 11

_"But the space between heaven and earth…"_

* * *

Sokka woke with a start, coming out of a deep sleep so quickly his head was spinning and his parka was buttoned before he realized he didn't know why he had put it on. Before he stopped to think about it, however, he was out in the predawn twilight. It was still summer, so the sun was riding parallel to the horizon. It would not set properly for a few more weeks.

Sokka ran along paths of snow permanently packed hard from centuries of wear. He knew, somehow, that she was out near the ocean, past the ramparts and the sentries. He shouted orders at his men as sprinted past, sending some for the Avatar, some for the Fire Nation Ambassador, and some for his grandmother. He also sent a few more out to search, though he knew he would be the one to find her. But he had to be responsible, just in case. He yelled Katara's name repeatedly. Echoes reverberated over the empty ice and bounced back off the wall that protected his tribe. Just as he felt his lungs beginning to burn he saw her.

She was right on the edge of the ice, kneeling where it melted away into the ocean. Her braid resembled a frayed rope, with loose strands floating in the freezing air. She was not wearing her parka and her bare hands rested limply in the snow at her sides. Even from a distance he could see her body shivering and shaking, but she continued to kneel, facing seaward.

"Katara!" Sokka wheezed but he disregarded it, trying desperately to make the distance between them disappear. As he took the last few steps in leaps, ignoring the stitch in his side, she whipped her head around and the water and snow around her followed the movement feebly. Sokka stared in horror as his worst fears were confirmed. Katara's lips were blue and her eyes were cloudy and ferverish. Small rivulets of water had frozen on her cheeks.

"Sokka…" Her voice was hoarse and barely audible. "Dad's ship… should have come last night… I missed it, Sokka…" Her eyes grew cloudier as tears filled them up. Sokka hurriedly removed his parka as he shushed Katara. He put it around her shoulders and started rubbing her hands as tears began to slip down the icy slides streaking Katara's cheeks.

"C'mon, Katara," he coaxed, trying to help her to stand, "we need to go back to the village." Katara seemed to come to for just a moment. Her eyes cleared and she whispered.

"I… can't…" Sokka understood that she was too weak to support herself, so he scooped her up as though she were a small child. She was not as heavy as she should have been. He turned towards the ice wall and saw Appa sailing towards him, capped by Aang and Zuko. Aang's face was white with worry and Zuko's mouth was a grim dash. Appa hit the ice with a grunt and Aang flew off him. Farther off Sokka could see a group of his soldiers scurrying along the wall. Water benders, some of whom Katara had trained, began opening the wall.

"Sokka!" Aang called to him. He was fast approaching.

"Aang!" Sokka yelled in return. A second more and Aang was beside him. "Aang, take Appa to the Northern Water Tribe and bring Yugoda back with you. Come back as fast as you can."

"But…" Aang began to protest, his eyes resting on Katara, who had fallen unconscious in Sokka's arms. Sokka refused to argue.

"Aang! Go! Now!" Aang turned back to Appa, fierce determination now etched on his face, as Zuko caught up. He was panting as Sokka had been. "Zuko, she needs to get warm. Will you come with me?" Zuko nodded and Sokka transferred Katara to his arms. Steam began rising from Katara's hair. "Slowly." Sokka warned. He turned to the wall. The water benders had bended a path in the ice by turning it to water. A canoe was speeding towards them. When it reached them, Zuko stepped on, gingerly. Spiraling tendrils of steam continued to rise from Katara's wet clothing into the grey twilight. Sokka sat in front of Zuko to block the wind that rushed by as the canoe was bended at top speed towards the gap in the ice wall. It was only after the water benders atop the wall had closed the corridor behind the little canoe that Sokka realized he had finally remembered Yugoda's name.


	12. Chapter 12

_"His intuition rilled out of him as tenderness and compassion."_

* * *

Two days and he had not slept. Two days at her bedside, making sure she was kept from throwing off the tightly wrapped furs, even though her skin was scorching, because Gran-gran said they must stay on. Two days of listening for any change in the ragged breathing coming from those furs. Two days of Water Tribe warriors with gray and black faces outside the door, guarding their Chief and the tribe's Master Waterbender. Two days of the village waiting with baited breath.

On the third day he was granted a small interruption. Reports came; the Air bison had been spotted in the sky as the sun fell but did not set. Sokka wanted to be startled because he hadn't expected Aang back for another day at least, but the sudden smidgeon of relief consumed him. Sokka supposed Appa had never flown harder and regretted he had no endless field of sweet grass to offer in thanks.

Yugoda was rushed into the room and Sokka was pushed out. His warriors did not blink at his bleary and bloodshot appearance. However, the Fire ambassador, perhaps as his equal, had no such qualms. He spoke softly.

"Sokka, you need rest and food." Sokka shook his head even as he thought Zuko was more like his uncle than he knew. Sokka sagged against the ice wall that separated him from his sister, too exhausted to be furious with her for going out on her own in the middle of the night but feeling angry nonetheless. "For your people, Sokka." Zuko added quietly so the soldiers wouldn't hear their master reminded of his duty. Sokka forced himself to recognize the truth of Zuko's words and nodded his head once, leaving with an image of a too-pale Katara (_again_) haunting his every thought.


	13. Chapter 13

_"Between the black isles it floated, softly parting the dark tide."_

* * *

The flame above the small basin of whale oil flickered, casting long shadows on the ice walls. There was little oil in the basin and the flame was not the roaring fire Sokka wanted it to be. After all, whale oil was rare because the cost to obtain was too often too high, and, of course, the room was made of ice and could only be heated so much. As it was, Zuko could hardly enter the room without causing the temperature to rise above freezing and causing the walls to drip. Katara was, therefore, kept warm by the finest furs the tribe had to offer. Sokka watched her sleep with a heavy heart. Her fever had finally receded, but Yugoda was concerned that Katara's recovery seemed to have stopped. She had yet to awaken and this worried Sokka more than anything. Yugoda had spoken plainly with the young chief, voicing fears that the fever would return. And then she suggested what Sokka was still considering.

_"It is possible her recovery would be easier in a warmer climate."_

The suggestion had caused a painful rift between Sokka's mind and heart. His mind told him that he should be willing to do anything, _anything_, for his sister, but his heart… Somewhere warmer meant Katara would not be in the South Pole and Sokka could not accompany her. He would have to stay behind, for his tribe, and leave Katara in someone else's hands. And if she didn't wake up before she left, then he wouldn't be there when she did. Sokka's heart told him this was too much to ask of him. In his sister's hour of greatest need, to be separated by thousands of miles? His father had never warned him that the title of chieftain would cost so much. And yet, as his mind mercilessly reminded him, shouldn't he take any measure, make any sacrifice he could to preserve Katara's life? His decision was made. He would have Aang go with Katara instead of him, along with some of the best warriors of the tribe.

Sokka rubbed his eyes with the back of his hands. A slight rustle from Katara had him glance up, but she had only shifted a little. Sokka continued watching her tensely. When she did not move again, Sokka sat back, the flow of hope within him stemmed. That was just it. Katara's sleep was never fitful, as though she _wanted_ to remain asleep. This was the worst part. He did not want to believe she had given up, after everything they had been through.

Could he really not go with her? He considered. That trip to the Fire Nation had been meant for the two of them, before she had refused to go… But now, somehow, it felt different. He admitted that he did not know how long Katara's recovery would take. Could he be gone for months? No, he did not want to leave the tribe so vulnerable. Besides that, he knew the villagers' reactions would be severe. To be deprived of their Master Bender as well as their Chief? Because Katara belonged to them as much as he did, maybe more, because she was Katara. No, he could not leave them alone at a time like this. He tried to quell any remaining doubts because he wanted to believe he was making the right decision even as his heart warned that though she had fought it the last time, if she sensed she was alone she might let go of everything this time.

He put his head in his hands again. Katara did not stir for the rest of the night.


	14. Chapter 14

_but__ love is the sky and __i__ am for you  
just__ so long and long enough_

-E.E. Cummings

* * *

The air was thick with mist. Somewhere, beyond the mist, the sun was shining brightly. So brightly, in fact, that Katara felt warm for what seemed the first time in many months. She looked around, expecting to see thick foliage and dense trees. Instead she saw that she was surrounded by an endless whiteness. It wasn't the glaring white of the South Pole at noon in summer, but the soft white of snow falling at twilight. Katara tried to remember where she was… what had happened before this place. But she couldn't seem to remember anything. She had a foreboding sense that something important was happening, but all she could see was the eternal white of her surroundings and soon it had driven all other thoughts away.

She didn't know how long she had been here, thinking of nothing, looking at nothing, being nothing. And then suddenly she thought she heard voices. Glancing around and seeing no one, she concentrated on listening. The voices sounded far away… and one in particular sounded familiar… it was a man's voice. She tried again to find any memories. Her mind still seemed as white and blank as her surroundings, but a feeling began creeping up from her stomach. Was it… guilt? Yes, and the voice belonged to Sokka! Her excitement was short lived as the memories began filling the blankness around her.

_"I think it's time to go home."_

_"Are you sure? I don't want you to get sick."_

_"I don't want you to say anything unless it's what _you_ want to say."_

Pain followed the guilt and the memories as the full weight of what was happening fell on her. Some of it was old pain, from her mother's death, and then her father's death, and now, she was letting Sokka down. She remembered this feeling, this situation, like it had all happened before. Memories continued to assail her and she realized this had happened before, that she was reliving that awful sickness again, that Sokka was reliving it with her… Voices crowded her now, growing louder and louder, hurting her ears and sending fresh waves of guilt coupled with images of snow and illness and anger and unhappiness…

The rush of memories faded abruptly, leaving her in the whiteness once again, only now it was accompanied by quiet sobbing that she vaguely recognized as her own. Tears floated away from her cheeks and hovered in the air around her, reflecting the opaque mist in a thousand tiny mirrors. When her eyes dried, she stared unfeelingly ahead, regretting that she had remembered anything at all and wishing that she had been content with the harmless whiteness and its soothing warmth. She attempted to return there, trying to erase the horrible sounds and sights she had just endured. She sat numbly, waiting for the feeling of guilt to subside, because she knew it would. She knew, somehow, that if she waited long enough all the feelings and voices and painful memories would go away. She knew in a way that made her feel she had done this before. Her eyes began to close and she thought this time would be the last time because it felt just a little different this time, just a little more permanent…

Movement flickered in her peripheral vision and reluctantly she stopped closing her eyes. She turned to her left to get a better look. There seemed to be a figure out beyond the mist, but she couldn't make it out. She focused her eyes a little more and discovered the figure was moving closer. As she watched the figure approach, she began to make out the general form: long hair, graceful movements, blue clothing. And when the figure seemed just beyond her outstretched hand, a voice infinitely warmer than the mist would ever be floated towards her.

_"__Katara__, don't give up."_ The voice pierced her core; it was her mother's.

"Mom!" Though she had thought all her tears had already been spilled, more and more dribbled off her cheeks to join the others suspended in the mist.

_"__Katara__, Sokka__ needs you."_

"But… I… Mom, I'm sick. I—I think I'm dy—"

_"You are a Waterbender and a Healer. Heal yourself_." Katara's eyes opened wide at these words, and then the blue figure in the mist just beyond her reach disappeared. Katara's tears crowded around her and she began to feel like she was drowning in them.

"No! Wait! Please…" But the figure did not return and Katara was left alone. _Alone…_She again decided she should let it all go, try to wipe her mind once again. Before she could, however, her mother's words echoed in her head.

_"__Sokka__ needs you."_

She wasn't alone; she would always have Sokka because he would never, never leave her alone. She grabbed onto the thought as if it was a piece of driftwood in her sea of tears and clung to it. She would not drown here, she could not drown here. If Sokka wouldn't leave her alone, then neither could she leave him alone. The thought reverberated with such clarity that she suddenly knew what she had to do. She reached deep inside herself and took control of her floating tears and the mist. The whiteness surrounding her slowly began to turn blue, glowing brighter as she directed it towards herself. The glow pulsed, flashing till she felt blinded by the blueness of it. She lifted her head and was covered in the blue glow, closing her eyes because of the strength of the light. As her consciousness began to slide away from her, she thought she heard a voice whispering in her ear.

_"I am so proud of you…both of you…"_


	15. Chapter 15

_"She was homeward bound at last in broad daylight."_

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Sokka lifted his head stiffly. He had fallen asleep while watching his sister and trying to decide whether he should go or stay. He stretched a little as his train of thought came back to him. He frowned at himself because though he had pondered the problem for most of the night, he was no closer to a solution. His head and his heart continued to disagree. He sighed heavily. Perhaps he would ask Gran-gran and Aang what they thought. Gran-gran, at least, would understand his dilemma. He began to stand when he heard a soft sound. He looked to Katara instantly, praying the hope coursing through him would not be betrayed yet again.

"So… Sokka…" Katara's voice was hoarse, but she was struggling to open her eyes. Sokka felt tears in the corners of his eyes. He sat back down. One of his hands found one of Katara's of its own accord and squeezed.

"I'm here, I'm here." Katara murmured unintelligibly in return. Sokka's mouth curved into a smile as he noticed Katara's own seemed to be doing the same. Her eyes opened carefully. Sokka's waiting tears slipped from his eyes because they were the crystalline blue he remembered from his childhood. Katara smiled weakly and tried to return his squeeze.

"I… knew you… wouldn't leave me." Her words came out between halted pauses. Sokka was crying softly now, as he hasn't cried since their mother died, but he kept her hand firmly in his own.

"No, I'll never leave you." Sokka's gratitude flowered inside him; he wouldn't leave her, ever, he promised himself, and was endlessly thankful he hadn't already sent her away. His instincts with Katara had been overwhelmingly right and he resolved to never question them again.

"Don't…cry. I'm not… leaving." Sokka's laugh mingled with his tears and Katara kept smiling. "I…promise." Katara sighed contentedly and closed her eyes. Sokka thought she had more to say, but she was still exhausted. He thought perhaps she would drift off again, but her eyes opened again. "I'm so… proud… of you… and so… is mom." Sokka's smile drooped a little in surprise. He wasn't sure how Katara knew, but she was still smiling and her words carried such conviction that his smile grew larger as his tears tapered off.

"And I'm so proud of you, Katara, for fighting this. You're stronger than anyone I know." He squeezed her hand again and she nodded her head, her eyes closed once more. The smile remained on her lips and Sokka felt like crying again because she was okay, she was going to live, she _wanted_ to live. A few minutes later and she hadn't moved. He thought she had fallen back asleep when he found her eyes on his face once more. He frowned though, because her smile had gone. "What's wrong? Are you cold?" Katara shook her head feebly before speaking.

"I'm sorry… for everything." She whispered. He could see a few tears glistening on her cheeks. He shushed her gently.

"It's okay. Everything's going to be okay. Just get better, huh?" Katara was smiling again.

"Mmh… I will." And then she did fall asleep, but she didn't let go of Sokka's hand, and nor did he let go of hers.


	16. Chapter 16

Note: Thanks to someone's very insightful review, I am positing another chapter. I realized after a few days of thinking about this in the back of my mind that I had been very inconsiderate of the reader and left something hanging when I had alluded to it more than once. My sincerest apologies; I regret to say it was poor judgement on my part. Let this be a lesson then, that good reviews are definitely worth your time. Sandra Evans, this is for you.

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_"—somewhere exciting, I hope, because I've lost so much time."_

* * *

The sun was falling now; winter would soon arrive. The Chief of the Southern Water tribe was waiting with the Fire's Ambassador as his attendants loaded his vessel for his voyage. Both men were silently contemplating all that had transpired during the diplomatic visit. Things were changing, again, and preparation was needed.

"Ambassador," Sokka began smoothly, "as much as I'm sure you've enjoyed our frigid hospitality, I trust next spring will bring an invitation from your uncle?" Zuko nodded. He was neither smiling nor frowning. Sokka took it for what it was worth: a token of good will. Sokka smiled to himself, pleased with his sense of humor, even if Zuko wasn't. Katara would laugh (_she laughed now_) at him later and complain his sense of humor was almost as bad as their father's (_because they could talk about him again_). He turned serious, however, because he wanted to share some of that gratitude he felt out loud.

"Thank you, Zuko, for your help." Zuko nodded yet again, though a ghost of smile made this one a little more than the last.

"Your sister offered to help me once, and it's the least I could do to repay her, even if I didn't accept her offer then." Sokka made a note to himself to ask Katara what he was talking about later. Sokka grinned at Zuko.

"I'm sure she'll want to come with me next spring." Zuko's phantom smile threatened to become more tangible, but he hid it with a half bow.

"I take my leave of you, Chief Sokka." Sokka inclined his head, ever loathe of the formalities inflicted on him by the Fire Nation's code of court conduct that never seemed to abandon its members (except perhaps Iroh). Zuko straightened and boarded his ship, looking back once, though Sokka was sure it wasn't for him. He didn't dwell on it, however, but turned back to his village with renewed vigor.


End file.
